5th Test Sydney

The fifth and final test from Sydney and neither team picked a spinner on what has traditionally been the most productive pitch for slow bowling down under.  I’m not one for subtlety so I’m going to call cricket Australia out for pitch doctoring.  Before the great Shane Warne came along Sydney was the ONLY pitch that spun but within a few years they were ALL going sideways.  Now Oz has in Starc, Hazlewood and Cummins a damn good seam attack, none of the pitches are spinning much instead they now resemble strips from division two of the county championship in April.  CA know what they are doing, this is deliberate and in all honesty no different to any other part of the cricketing world, except perhaps England?  In which case more fool us, there’s nothing wrong with home advantage as long as it doesn’t become farce as it has done in Pakistan and India in the not so distant past.  This is where the match referee and pitch inspectors need to show some bollocks.

Anyway, England won the toss and batted first, as usual we threatened to dig ourselves into a deep whole but Root and Brook got in and made it count.  By the time bad weather curtailed play England had reached 211-3, a decent position if far from a dominant one but for once this winter I was actually looking forward to day two.  I should have known better, what happened next was predictable.  Brook got out playing a nothing shot, quickly followed by Stokes so I went to bed.
What I found when checking in the following morning was also predictable, Root got a big ton, Smith scored a few but got out to a stupid shot and England ended up probably 70 runs short.  England’s openers bowled badly allowing Australia to bat comfortably to the end of play and finished 166 -2.  Carthorse is not a test cricketer let alone an opening bowler.

I listened to the start of day three and it began okay but when Potts came on and started chucking pies again, then Head was badly dropped I’d heard enough.  When I picked things up again the following morning it was no surprise to see Oz had amassed over 500 runs and were in full control of the match with Head and bloody Smith both getting tons.  Day four started with the possibility of an innings defeat and things looked grim when Stokes went off injured but Tongue knocked a couple over and Aus weren’t able to do much more damage.  As usual I clicked the App in the morning with trepidation but what I saw had me saying “fucking hell” in a positive tone.  Bethell was 142 not out and England had a 119 run lead with two wickets left.  Further scrutiny revealed 40+ scores for Duckett and Brook along with a load of single figure scores.  How many more runs will we need to make a game of this?  Probably too many but at least we’ve lasted until the fifth day.

7^th January 2025, my last opportunity to listen to a bit of Ashes cricket from down under, although that four years seems to come around at an alarming rate these days.  I half expected us to be blown away quickly but Potts survived and Bethell nudged his way past 150 and the lead crept up.  When Bethell edged behind it was time to climb the stairs.  England set 150 odd which was a challenge Australia completed with 5 wickets left to take the match and the 4-1 series win.  Now let the inquiries begin and never have they been more necessary.