Tuesday, 6 December 2016

Anti Xmas music advent Calendar Part 1

The 'Xmas single' has to be one of the biggest crimes against humanity ever unleashed upon the masses.  They are, almost without exception, a hastily thrown together musical bucket of vomit spewed all over our ears.  The Xmas No.1 is coveted only because it's the single that will make the most cash for the industry throughout the fifty two weeks and the pretense that quality of music actually matters has long been shattered.  Everyone knows the Xmas single is a pile of shite but the industry knows the sheeple will go out and buy it anyway.

If that isn't bad enough, every December we get all this utter filth thrown at us again.  Year after year we are subjected to Noddy fucking Holder screaming you know what and Roy bloody Wood lying through his teeth, wishing it could be Xmas everyday.  Fucking Wham and their sickeningly sweet loveliness and all those other horrors we've heard a million times.  I expect these criminals still lap up the royalties ta very much, bastards.

Anyway, the dreaded main event is still a couple of weeks away but normally rational people are still allowing themselves to get wrapped up in something they call...

 'Xmas spirit'

I live in dread of December.  I can handle the shitty weather but the bullshit gets me down.  Halloween isn't scary, it's just more bollocks, a prelude to the real nightmare approaching.

"It's the most wonderful time of the year..." So says the song, can't remember who sung it but that is irrelevant because its just more cheesy Xmas shit.  Anyway, fuck that, D D D Don't believe the hype!

Drink yourself to death "because its Xmas...".  Stuff your gullet full of shit, wear a permanent prozac grin.  Dress like a knob..."Because..."

"Because its Xmas..." the age old excuse for acting like a total cock.   Or to put it a bit more politely acting a little..

Collective lunacy caused by the season.  Faux forced madness, "I'm mad me, I just don't care..."  Chase them outa town!

Marvin wasn't really talking about Xmas but he could have been and everything else he sings about is still going on today.  Mankind hasn't learnt a damn thing but forget all that, cheer up its fucking Xmas...

In the year of brexit, here's one for all the mugs who didn't really have a clue what they were voting for.  This is what we're left with.  At least the soundtrack is class.

Yes it's been a mad year.  Here's one for our American brothers who managed to hold an election contested by two of the worst candidates it is possible to imagine.  When Xmas passes the New Year heralds...

We need an antidote to the madness.  Xmas is the poison, this is the remedy.  Turn it right up, drown out the carols and cheesy Xmas shite.  Do it Now!